Soccer Lesson by Evan Oei

I've never known much about the world of soccer. There are a handful of team names that I can recite and that's about it. I've watched the World Cup with friends and pretty much cheered for whoever they wanted me too.

But I'm learning.

Not from watching actual games or following a club, mind you, but from my roommates' incessant devotion to FIFA. They can play for hours, and apparently the unemployed screw-up I've become has nothing better to do than watch. As you can imagine, I've learned a thing or two. Hopefully, what I've picked up from the simulated games can translate into actual football knowledge. Some important lessons:

1.     Belittle Your Opponent: The most important part of soccer is making sure that your rival feels worthless. It's as much a mental game as it is physical. From what I understand the best way to accomplish this is constantly reiterating the fact that the opposing player is "a little bitch."

2.     Curse Loud and Curse Often: The success of your team is directly correlated to the number of times you drop the f-bomb. Raising the volume of your voice and stamping your feet at the same time amplifies your success rate. As a bonus, it's almost guaranteed to improve relations with your downstairs neighbors.

3.     Get Violent When Necessary: If the opposing player scores a goal that you consider "cheap," "unfair," or "total bullshit" but won't admit it, then it is completely within reason to attack them physically. Jumping on them and punching them repeatedly is legal contact.

4.     Gloat After Victory: Winning a match means you are the superior human being. Act accordingly. The status only lasts until the next game which generally occurs immediately after the first.

I admit that there is still a lot I have to learn, but this is a good start. Everyone knows that mastering a sport takes dedication, so I work on skills #1 and #2 even when I'm not on the pitch. In time, I might even be ready to take on Sweater Kid, 2488 Hughes' Resident FIFA master. Until then, I’ll just keep practicing.

-Other Celebrity Guest Blogger Evan Oei of http://2488hughes.wordpress.com/

Johntimes on Fernando Torres

He probably missed.

I have been a fan of the Spanish national soccer team ever since I started watching the World Cup in middle school. For the past few years, Fernando Torres was one of my favorite players.  His flashy attitude as well as his quickness/ball-skills made him an exciting player to watch. Because he was so young and athletic when he joined the league, experts believed he had tremendous potential. After being the fastest to ever score 50 goals for Liverpool, he proved those experts to be right on.

Unfortunately, this recent season has been a serious disappointment with the possibility of an even worse future. After being transferred to Chelsea for 50 million Euros, Torres has recorded one of his worst years to date. He has had the same amount of goals as he as gotten carded (5). With the Euro Cup approaching in June of 2012, Torres is now fighting for his just for a spot on the Spanish national team. Roberto Soldado and Fernando Llorente are two current prospects threatening his position. 

After watching him play this summer, its obvious that Torres needs to work on his confidence and motivation. He has all the skills needed to be one of the best players in the league- yet, he hasn't been able to fully live up to his potential. Whatever issue he has right now must be resolved within the next couple months if he wants to represent Spain in 2012. Perhaps playing with his 2010 World Cup Champion team will help- but if he wants to be a continual dominant force in the Premier League- Torres has got to step his game up. 

-celebrity guest blogger John of http://johntimes.wordpress.com/

Liverpool vs. Manchester City

Liverpool yet again found themselves in the game of the week, playing league leaders Manchester City. Manchester City came into the game undefeated, and looked to preserve that untarnished record. Liverpool, on the other hand, looked to maintain the momentum gained from the Chelsea victory. I was extremely nervous going into this game, as Manchester City have looked like world beaters this season. However, Liverpool brought their A game. The game ended in a 1-1 draw, but should have been a victory for Liverpool in my opinion. The second half of the game they dominated, holding possession and creating chances all over the place. If not for the superhuman abilities of Manchester City goalkeeper Joe Hart, Liverpool would definitely have secured those elusive three points.

Joe Hart was a brick wall in net.

Besides Joe Harts acrobatic saves in net, the other story of the game was mad man Mario Balotelli. Balotelli came on as a substitute, much to his chagrin, and played as if he was incredibly upset not to be starting. He lasted 18 minutes before being shown the red card and being sent to an early shower. Balotelli continues to add to his crazy act, either being the man of the match or the scapegoat almost every time. I continue to find him hilarious, as he is incredibly talented but possibly insane. It just seems like every time he sets on the field he's almost bipolar. Either he is a relentless attacking force, or he is a pouting child stomping about the pitch. Roberto Mancini, the manager of City, must find him much less funny than I do, and I'm surely will be bald from pulling all of his hair out by season's end.

Extended Highlights

Chelsea vs. Liverpool Recap

Glen Johnson, the former Chelsea defender, is the man of the hour.

Liverpool played a crucial away game over the weekend, playing Chelsea away at Stamford Bridge. It was crucial for the fact that Liverpool had not been playing at their best as of late, and my team the Reds desperately needed a game to show their mettle. Liverpool did not disappoint, stealing a victory in the 87th minute on a fantastic solo effort from Glen Johnson. It was especially great for me to have Johnson score a goal, as the defender is a former Chelsea man himself, so this really digs the dagger in deep. Chelsea will surely be regretting having let the England national go.

There's a link to the highlights and some more about Chelsea after the jump.

Ireland Qualifies for Euro 2012

Ireland is in to Euro 2012

Since the International break is currently taking place, and therefore there is no league football, I figured I'd take a moment to cover one of the big stories of International play. Ireland qualified yesterday for the Euro 2012, the International competition between the best of the European sides. This is a huge deal for the Irish people, and one that I can revel in, being Irish myself. It has a certain feel of redemption as well, after the so-called "Hand of Frog" (Thierry Henry's clear handball that netted the winner for France) that knocked us out of the World Cup qualifiers at the last minute. The people of Ireland are ecstatic to be into Euro 2012, and rightly should be. I know I will be anxiously awaiting the start of the tournament next June.

Tevez back? Or is he?

I had previously posted about Carlos Tevez' ongoing problems with his club Manchester City, when he decided that he could choose when to play and when not to. Since then, Tevez, the Players Association and Manchester City have worked to get Tevez back playing in baby blue. Now, however, it appears that he is determined not to play yet again, as he has gone back to Argentina against the wishes of team management. Why is this guy so determined not to play? If he wants out he should ask for it, but he just is going about it in a completely nonsensical way.

 In my opinion, he's only going to hurt himself in the end, because, what team is going to want to pay millions of dollars for a guy who only wants to play on his terms. He's the complete opposite of a team player, someone who's selfish and is completely unwilling to cooperate with not only his team, but his own Player's association. Maybe it can be worked out that he can come back to the club, but any further wrongdoing will have him out of a job. The ball is in Tevez' court now.

 Three strikes and you're out, Carlos.

Arsenal Back In It?

After an absolutely horrific start to the season for Arsene Wenger's Arsenal side, I, like many throughout the sport wrote off the team from North London. Winning two of your first seven games tends to have that effect on people. However, it appears that there is a revival of sorts going on at their home, the Emirates Arena. Since this horrid start, they have rebounded, winning three of their last four, including a massive victory at Chelsea this past weekend.

There weren't many happy faces at the Emirates until recently.

While several weeks ago it appeared Wenger's head was rightly going to be on the chopping block, he now has his fans believing again that they could make something of this season. I've always had mixed feelings about Wenger, because I love the attacking, free-flowing style of play that he has implemented at Arsenal. However, he always seems too keen to buy cheap, young players that don't necessarily pan out, rather than splash the cash for established talent. It seems even when he realizes he must spend more, he will opt to buy several risky players rather than one sure fire guy. His younger players and new purchases are gelling, and it seems Arsenal's rapid rise up the Premier League table should continue, for the time being.